The Republican National Committee on Tuesday released a fake schedule of the upcoming fall meeting hosted by their political counterparts at the Democratic National Committee, including fabricated panels like “Where is Michigan?” and “No Money, Mo Problems.”
The RNC sent an email to members of the press with the subject line “ADVISORY: Major Updates to DNC Fall Meeting,” referencing the DNC’s summit in Las Vegas this weekend.
The advisory schedule was full of made-up panels and speeches mocking Democrats for various things from the past year, including “Where is Michigan? A geographical presentation of what exists between New York and Los Angeles” and “The Menendez Mess: How to keep a convicted felon in the United States Senate,” a nod to the ongoing corruption trial of New Jersey Sen. Bob Menendez.
The point of contact for the faux schedule was DNC Chairman Tom Perez, for which the RNC used a “brown.edu” email address in an apparent nod to Perez’s new position as a senior fellow at Brown University.
Brown said upon announcing his bid to become DNC chairman that it would be “full-time job” and the party would be best served with “someone committed here for the long haul,” according to The Baltimore Sun.
Here's the full fake schedule:
Thursday, October 19th
7:00pm Opening Remarks - Bernie Sanders (I-VT)
As prepared for the upcoming Women's Convention
Friday, October 20th
10:00am Where is Michigan?
A geographical presentation of what exists between New York and Los Angeles
11:30am Should She Stay or Should She Go Now?
A roundtable discussion of the future of Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi moderated by Rep. Linda Sanchez (D-CA)
1:00pm No Money, Mo Problems
Investments the DNC would like to make - but can't
3:00pm The Menendez Mess
How to keep a convicted felon in the United States Senate
5:00pm Ok, but really… 'What Happened'?
A continuing conversation about who to blame for Hillary Clinton's loss
Saturday, October 21st
9:00am Doing Data Right
Hillary Clinton and DNC CEO Jess O'Connell explain how the RNC has "sped past" the Democrats in data, technology, and party infrastructure
10:00am Weinstein Shopping Spree
How to spend the $300,000 in money we won't return from Harvey Weinstein
12:00pm Litmus Tests Over Lunch
A guest lecture by Brown University Professor Tom Perez on banishing pro-life Democrats and mandating support for single-payer
Abortion: Replicating Mello-Drama Nationwide
Failed Omaha mayoral candidate Heath Mello will present ways that the national party can insert hot-button issues like abortion into local races across the heartland
Single-Payer Shuffle
A master class in how to dance around specifics, like how to pay for a $32 trillion government takeover of health care
3:00pm Moral Victories
Jon Ossoff (GA-06), Rob Quist (MT-AL), Archie Parnell (SC-5), Jim Thompson (KS-4) discuss why they actually won their special elections
5:00pm Impeachment or Else
Billionaire donor Tom Steyer lays out his requirement that candidates back a baseless impeachment effort that alienates the vast majority of voters