- My nickname may be “Big Mack,” but I’d never in my life actually had a McDonald’s Big Mac until last week.
- Never a fan of fast food, I was worried it would taste disgusting, but it wasn’t as bad as I feared.
- It was also cheaper than I expected.
- I can see why some people would like it, but I hope to never have one again.
- It’s also worrying how popular they are despite the fact most people know they’re unhealthy, coming in at more than 500 calories.
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I’ve been on this earth for three decades. And yet, in all that time, I had never had a McDonald’s Big Mac, even though my nickname is “Big Mack.”
I know: it’s weird. Then again, until last week I genuinely couldn’t remember the last time I had even had fast food. I think it was Taco Bell during my first year of college at Boise State University (where our basketball stadium at the time was literally named the Taco Bell Arena). That was back in 2008.
It was probably foolish of me to casually mention this to my editor, because she suggested trying my first one at age 30 would make a great story. “You might learn something,” she suggested.
Spoiler: I did. Still, while the taste wasn’t as bad as I feared, I hope to never eat one again – especially while sober.
The Big Mac is, of course, what McDonald's is most famous for.
First introduced in 1967, the Big Mac is as synonymous with McDonald's as McDonald's itself is synonymous with fast food and American culture. It's such a worldwide icon, there's even something called the Big Mac Index - The Economist uses it to compare the cost of living in different countries.
I grew up in the US, where there are reportedly more than 14,000 locations — including more than 200 in my home state of Oregon.
McDonald's is seemingly everywhere. Even the small town west of Portland, Oregon that was the closest settlement to the horse farm I grew up on had one - it was the last McDonald's between Portland and the hour-long drive to the Oregon Coast.
Thanks to the way I was raised — and a viewing of "Super Size Me" — I couldn't remember the last time I'd eaten at a McDonald's.
I was fortunate to grow up on a farm and in a family where we ate fresh, healthy meals with natural ingredients. We basically never ate out - and certainly never fast food. What really helped prompt my aversion to fast food (and McDonald's in particular) however was a documentary I saw in school.
Released in 2004, Morgan Spurlock's "Super Size Me" is a horrifying look at what eating at McDonald's regularly can do to a person. It was so shocking, it's claimed the release of the documentary - which made more than $22 million at the box office, and generated a massive amount of media coverage and debate - prompted McDonald's to discontinue offering the "super size" (e.g. extremely large) option for its meals. It should be noted, however, that McDonald's itself has repeatedly denied the documentary was the reason.
This is despite the fact my high school nickname was "Big Mack."
Thanks to my last name and the fact I was a varsity athlete (swimming and water polo), my nickname for as long as I can remember was "Big Mack." But Big Mack had never had a Big Mac - and was proud of this fact.
That all changed in late November 2019 - on Thanksgiving, to be precise.
With purportedly more than 1,200 locations in the UK — and 200-plus in London — it wasn't hard to find one close to the Insider newsroom.
McDonald's claims to have more than 200 locations in London alone. The nearest to the Insider newsroom was at Liverpool Street station, one of the busiest train stations in the entire UK.
Amid the gloom of the late afternoon rain, we began our trek.
It was so cold, my colleague and I could see our breath - then again, this was London in late fall, after all. Dubai it was not. Wet asphalt slick from all the rain, we trudged through the puddles and tunnels. Each step felt important as we drew closer to what felt like some great doom that was upon us - or at least me. My Big Mac-free streak was about to come to an inglorious end.
It would turn out to be no epic journey — we reached Liverpool Street station, where the closest one was, in just a few minutes. It did not look like I expected.
Connected to the station, even I was familiar with the golden arches logo. But the things I had expected in my mind - a drive-thru, Ronald McDonald, and an indoor play structure for kids - were nowhere to be found. From the outside, it looked like a normal restaurant. I even quite liked the actual stone arch complementing the golden arches.
We stepped inside. The hour of doom had arrived. Showtime.
Walking inside, I was flummoxed by the electronic touch-screens that were being used to order. I was grateful my colleague showed me how they worked.
The restaurant seemed only about half full - or at least had almost as many large touchscreens as people inside. There was only one problem: I had never used a touchscreen to order food before. How did they work? Were they like ATM machines, or self-checkouts at supermarkets? Apparently so, as my colleague walked me through what to do step-by-step.
There were way more choices than I was expecting. But I was finally able to find and select the Big Mac.
I didn't realize the McDonald's menu was so expansive - I expected just a few different sizes of burgers, the Big Mac, some chicken nuggets, and various sides like fries, milkshakes, and McFlurry ice creams, as I later found of they were called.
But the sheer number of choices was absolutely mind-boggling. Everything seemed customizable, too: you could request certain toppings like pickles or onion not be included, add extra cheese or meat, some kind of "special sauce" thing... it was borderline overwhelming.
It was a good thing I already knew what I needed to get. Just a regular Bic Mac. Simple. Tasty? We would soon find out.
I had no idea how much a Big Mac would cost. It turned out to be a lot less than I was expecting.
The "combo meal" - which included the Big Mac, a side, and a drink - was £4.89 ($6.30). It was obviously more than I'd pay if cooking at home and buying ingredients from the supermarket, but still a lot less than I thought it would be. With London being expensive to live in, I thought the meal would cost £10 ($13) or more.
That being said, I still thought the price was too high, especially for those trying to feed an entire family. It probably doesn't cost McDonald's very much to actually make a Big Mac - in fact, an image that went viral on Reddit in 2014 purportedly posted by McDonald's employees suggested it cost McDonald's just 77 cents to make one Big Mac.
Burger selected, next I had to choose my sides. I went with water and something called "reindeer treats," which turned out to be carrot sticks.
The name was irresistible. "Reindeer treats." Were they some kind of special fries? Nuts? Candy? Something else?
A little disappointed to discover they were carrot sticks, I was glad McDonald's at least had healthy options to go with the unhealthy stuff. I also liked how on the menu, exact calorie counts were displayed with each item - the reindeer treats had just 34 calories. The Big Mac had more than 500.
Gulp.
I was then given a ticket, which I took over to a counter to pick up my food. It was ready in about a minute.
Even I knew that McDonald's was famed for fast service. Sure enough, almost as soon as my ticket was printed out, my order number was called. Quick indeed. Behind the counter, it looked like there were more than dozen people working at least. That maybe should not have been surprising: McDonald's claims to employ more than 120,000 people in the UK, and more than a million worldwide.
This particular McDonald's had no place to sit inside, so we ventured back out into the rain to "enjoy" our meal.
London being London, everything outdoors was damp. Exiting the McDonald's, we walked directly into the station to join the hordes of commuters pressed nearly shoulder-to-shoulder. Snaking through the veritable sea of humanity with my brown paper bag filled with "treasure" - er, food - we found an unoccupied bench to sit and eat. The fateful moment was getting closer.
I tried the "reindeer treats" first. They tasted OK.
The reindeer treats at least tasted like normal baby carrot sticks - no extra sugar or salt. But that was not the main reason I had gone to McDonald's.
But then it was time for the Big Mac. I knew how unhealthy they are, so I was worried.
When it came time to try the Big Mac, I was glad to have my colleague with me for support. To use a "Star Wars" quote, this would be a day long remembered. Then again, the character who said that quote (the evil Darth Vader) would soon have to watch as the "ultimate power in the universe" (the Death Star, of course) he was tasked with defending was blown up by Luke Skywalker and the virtuous Rebel Alliance. So... yeah.
With three pieces of bread, two patties of meat, chopped lettuce, cheese, and some kind of white sauce, it smelled kind of funny.
I didn't think the Big Mac looked very appealing. There was nothing wrong with the sesame seed, light-colored bun, but the whole thing smelled like onions and vinegar - not the most appetizing of scents in my opinion. Maybe it would taste better?
Nervously, I took my first bite.
This was it. The moment I had been dreading.
"So, are you going to eat it?"" asked my colleague.
I nodded nervously, and gulped.
Drawing in breath, I closed my eyes as I raised the burger to my mouth. It was warm, and squishy. It also smelled worse the closer it was to my nose.
I probably looked ridiculous just holding the warm food item in my frozen fingers (even inside the station surrounded by so many people, it was very cold) in front of my face, so I opened my mouth and took a bite.
While not as disgusting as I had feared, I wouldn't call it the best burger I've ever had. But I could also see why some people would like them.
There was an explosion of something as I bit down. Meat. Bread. Cheese. Definitely onions. But it was the sauce that really stood out - it almost had a tartness to it.
The burger was also very chewy.
If anything, the flavor kind of reminded me of a saucier version of a Döner kebab, which were massively popular where I used to live in Germany. Döner were also very popular after a big night out - and I could see why a Big Mac would be too, especially if someone was very much not sober and just needed something to soak up some of the alcohol/get some food in their system. Back in New Zealand, I knew plenty of Kiwis who'd visit the "Macca's" late at night for that very reason.
The verdict? I'm still a bit baffled by the cult of the Big Mac — but perhaps slightly less so now.
According to the McDonald's website (and the nutrition info displayed when ordering), there are 508 calories in one Big Mac - more than a quarter of a person's recommended total daily calorie intake. Worse, there are 25 grams of fat. which might negate the 26 grams of protein (higher than I would have ever guessed). In other words: it really isn't something you want to eat regularly.
And then there was the lingering, onion-y aftertaste.
I could see why some people might like it, or at least tolerate it when in desperate need of something to lessen a hangover. But I really couldn't fathom why anyone would want to eat it regularly. At the end of the day, I felt it was just another fast food burger.
It's definitely not something I would ever spend my own money on, or eat willingly.
While I've now had my first Big Mac, it was hopefully the only one I'll ever have - at least while sober.
Sorry not sorry, McDonald's.
Then again, seeing as you generated more than $21 billion in revenue in 2018, you probably don't need my business, anyway.
Either way, I'm definitely not lovin' it.
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