- I hit middle age and regretted not seeing more of the world.
- My mother's death inspired me to go outside my comfort zone and take steps to live more fearlessly.
- Now, my husband and I spend nearly half a year in France.
I woke up in a panic a few years ago when I realized that at 53, I had spent most of my adult life living in one place. Sure, I'd traveled over the years, but I hadn't lived outside the DC area since moving back here from Chicago at 26.
I thought it would be a quick stopover on my way somewhere else — perhaps to New York to work in magazine publishing or to California to work in the entertainment business. It never happened.
Soon after I got back to DC, my whole world turned upside down when my mother was diagnosed with a rare fatal disease. My family was devastated, and I put my plans of moving away on hold to be with her. She was sick for 13 years, and even though I don't regret the decision to spend that time with her, I often wonder how my life would have been different if I'd moved elsewhere.
I met my husband and reevaluated my life
Even after my mom was gone, I couldn't bring myself to pull up roots and start over somewhere else. What was holding me back? Fear of change? Fear of loneliness? Fear of failure? Probably all of those things. Or maybe I had used my mother's illness as an excuse to avoid taking risks because it was easier than facing the unknown.
I met my husband two months after my mom died, so staying in DC had a big silver lining. But I was never able to shake my intense wanderlust. The pandemic, of course, made lots of people rethink their lives and priorities, and I was no different.
During lockdown, I'd spend hours walking around our neighborhood listening to Rick Steves talk about his adventure across the globe, and I swore that once we could travel again, we would make it a priority. I'm happy to say that this time, I made good on that promise.
Putting my no-regrets plan in motion
By the spring of 2023, my husband and I had lost our beloved pets, and for the first time in our 13 years together, we were "empty nesters." Nothing, except for fear of the unknown, stopped us from making a big change. In my heart, I felt like it was now or never, and I was determined not to let anything get in the way.
We started talking about the possibility of living part-time in France, a place we both love and how to put our plan in motion. The idea of picking up and moving was too overwhelming, so we started with baby steps. Last winter, we spent three weeks living like locals in Bordeaux and Toulouse, and this past spring, we spent nearly two months in Paris, the Loire Valley, and Brittany.
Each trip has been eye-opening, and we've met new people, made connections, and tapped into a world of expats and wanna-be expats on Facebook and elsewhere. My French isn't very good but I do my best to speak it as much as I can, or at least try. Every time we go, I'm energized, and even when it's stressful, simply being somewhere new gives me an unexpected lift and fills me with possibility. I know I'm incredibly fortunate and privileged to be able to have this adventure and to finally explore more of the world.